The plain and simple truth these days is that a lot of domestic violence victims are arrested. There are two scenarios where this may happen.
Personally, I fell into reason #2. And I wasn’t even at home when it occurred. The man took a beer bottle and beat himself over the head and on his arms, then called the police stating I had attacked HIM. He came up with a very convincing story and had plenty of cuts and bruises to show when the police arrived. He later called them back and admitted to making up the abuse story.
I can home from work after an eight-hour shift to find a paper stating I would be arrested for criminal domestic violence. This man looked at me and bragged about “straightening things out so I wouldn’t go to jail.” I left him soon after this incident and never looked back.
I still shake my head in disbelief when I think of how far he went to get me into trouble. If it weren’t true it would almost be funny. I never thought a woman could get in trouble for something she didn’t do when she wasn’t even around to do it.
Could this happen to you as a victim? It can and often does. Sometimes the man will inflict injury on himself. He may even go so far as to make the call to police saying YOU’RE abusing HIM!
Many times the decision to arrest is placed upon one officer based on the injuries and who he believes. If the abuser is a good actor and the victim is hysterical and terrified, the wrong person is likely to go to jail.
The same holds true if you were attacked by this person and did an excellent job of defending yourself. This isn’t fair and it happens quite often these days. Whoever has the most injuries is labeled the “victim.”
The main thing to remember when the police arrive is to remain as calm as possible. Screaming and attacking the abuser while the police are present will definitely earn you a trip before a judge. Some officers automatically harbor a resentment toward women for one reason or another. Many don’t like going out on domestic calls and want to lock up everyone involved.
Whether you are locked up or not, make sure someone takes photographs of all of your injuries as bruises and cuts may heal quickly. A bruise is also good to photograph about three days down the road after it turns red and blue and green and black. It doesn’t matter if the police officer took photos, do it yourself. If you’re in jail you need to arrange with your defense attorney to have photos taken.
Victims of domestic violence being arrested aren’t always women. Sometimes the woman is the instigator and fakes injuries so the man will go to jail.
Here’s a link to an advocacy for domestic violence victims website. Read it carefully as there’s a lot of good information. I recommend you read it before you need a victims advocate. After all, forewarned is forearmed.